Happy Ending
by blowflylaura
Summary: Sian's looking for something that she doesn't have yet.
1. Chapter 1

**Happy Ending:**

Everybody wants to live happily ever after. They want the stereotypical Disney happy ending. The prince marries the princess and the bad guy dies. That's what everybody wants in life. Except Disney make it look so fucking simple when in reality, getting a happy ending is the hardest thing imaginable.

I was 16 when we met. My best friend at the time introduced us and I was attracted to him straight away. It wasn't love at first sight but I wanted to be with him. He asked me out pretty much straight away and the rest as they say is history.

I was 17 when we first slept together. I thought it was the right thing to do. We'd been dating for a year and I hadn't felt ready until then. He understood that and never once did he push me. I will always respect and love him for that. He gave me space when I asked and he cuddled me when I told him I needed him.

I was 20 when he proposed. He planned a surprise party for my birthday, not knowing that I hated them. The idea of all your family and friends hiding in a small space behind different parts of the furniture in the dark didn't sit right with me. He told me a few months later that he chose to propose at my surprise party because he wanted to see everybody's reaction, not just mine. His proposal had been sweet; I guess it was how I'd imagined he would do it. I'd always dreamt of being proposed to in New York in Times Square but Ryan didn't know that. I hadn't told him. I suppose that should have set off warning bells, should have made me think about our relationship. I hadn't told the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with one of my dreams.

I was 22 when I thought I had managed to get my happy ending. I'd finally married the man I loved and we were happy. We were even contemplating starting a family, some may think that we were a bit quick off the bat but after being together since we were 16, having a family seemed like the next natural step. I knew that we'd be great parents, even though we both had our doubts, I knew they were just superficial. I had confidence that Ryan would be a great father and he constantly told me that I would make the world's greatest mother. He even joked that our child would buy me the mug with that phrase on it. I appreciated his confidence in me.

I was 23 when I miscarried. We'd been fast asleep in bed when I suddenly felt it. At first I thought I had wet myself, I was only 15 weeks so I knew it couldn't be my waters breaking but as I switched the light on, my eyes fell on the pool of blood which covered my bed sheets. I couldn't speak, I couldn't do anything. I was frozen in fear as my hands grasped my stomach in pain. You hear about people having miscarriages all the time but you never expect it to happen to you. When you find out you're pregnant, you never expect that you won't carry it for the full nine months. Ryan sensed my fidgeting and woke up before telling me what to do. It was because of him that I ended up in the hospital, if I had been alone, I wasn't sure I'd have managed to move.

After my miscarriage our marriage changed in every aspect. I didn't want him to touch me anymore; I couldn't get over the loss of our unborn baby. I may never have met them but I grieved for them. Ryan would constantly come home from work to find me crying either on the couch or on our bed. At first he would cuddle me but as time went by, I pushed him further and further away and eventually I was left to cry alone. He constantly tried to talk to me, tried to get me to open up but I just pushed him away. I was horrible to him and I should have let him help me. The arguments began when he suggested we should try for another baby. I shouted at him, told him that having another baby wouldn't replace the one we had lost. He yelled back that that wasn't what he meant. After that we argued nearly every day.

I was 24 when I met her. I'd been drowning my sorrows, after yet another argument with Ryan, when she sat down beside me. I told her my name was Sian and she introduced herself as Sophie Webster and from that moment on, I knew I was in trouble. I was memorised by her, everything about her. The way she moved, the way she talked, the way she said my name.

As soon as she kissed me, I knew what would happen. I knew that that one kiss would lead to sex. I knew that I would cheat on Ryan but it didn't stop me. I kissed Sophie back and when she told me she had a flat nearby, I let her lead me. I let her undress me and kiss me all over, erasing every kiss from Ryan. I let her push me back onto the bed and when she climbed on top of me and sucked on my pulse point, I didn't tell her to stop, I didn't tell her not to leave a mark. I let her brand me in a way that nobody else had ever managed to do. I wasn't thinking about what would happen if Ryan saw it, at that moment Ryan was the last thing on my mind.

When it was my turn to please her, I panicked. I'd never done this before. I had let this girl take something precious from me, almost like my second virginity but I didn't mind. I found myself wishing that she had taken my virginity properly. I found myself feeling more comfortable with her than I ever did with Ryan. She could see my panic and she simply kissed me telling me I didn't need to do anything I didn't want to. She was so genuine with her concern it made my heart swell. I knew right there that I had feelings for her although I ignored the true extent of them. I pushed her back onto the bed and claimed her like she had claimed me.

That night blew my mind, she made me feel things I'd never felt before. Things felt entirely different with her than it ever did with Ryan. She was gentle yet rough at the same time, she pushed me into doing things I hadn't been able to do since the miscarriage yet she wasn't forceful in any way. Afterwards, we lay in bed, spent. She played with my fingers and when her finger found my wedding ring, she didn't say anything but I could see the hurt that resided behind her eyes. She thought that she was a quick fuck and nothing more, I could tell. I kissed her softly and told her that she had made me feel more alive than I had ever felt. I thanked her for that and then went back to my husband.

I was 26 when Ryan and I finally had a child. A little boy called Patrick. As soon as he was born I could tell that he would grow up to be the spit of Ryan. He'd be a little heartbreaker when he was older. That was what everybody said when they saw him. Our family and friends told me that he looked like Ryan and strangers would tell me that he was adorable, cute or precious. The adjectives varied from person to person.

After my night with Sophie, I had come back to sort things out with Ryan. I wasn't a cheater, that's not who I am. I had made vows and damn it I was going to stick to them. I wasn't that girl who could have an affair, I couldn't do that. Not to Ryan. We went to counselling for several months and gradually things began to get back to normal.

Except things would never be normal again.

They couldn't be, not after I had spent the night with Sophie Webster. She had changed my entire perspective of life for the better. One night had been enough to make me fall for her but it was also enough to ruin my marriage if Ryan ever found out.

I was right when I said Ryan would be a brilliant dad. He's amazing with Patrick. Patrick's 3 now and Ryan is a hands-on dad. One of our problems had been that he went out to work whilst I stayed at home and had nothing to do but think and my thoughts always landed on our unborn child. He promised things would change and they did. He quit work and decided to become a hands-on dad which allowed me to go to work. I started work in a local catering company, just as kitchen staff but over the years, I worked my way up the career ladder and now work as head chef.

Ryan tells me every day how proud he is of me and how much he loves me.

I tell him I love him too because I do. I just don't think I'm in love with him, not anymore. Honestly I don't think I have been since my encounter with Sophie. It's been five years since I saw her but I can still remember what she looked like.

What she smelt like.

It's been five years but I can still remember Sophie Webster. Every day she plagues my thoughts and I can't help but wonder what if?

What if things had been different?

What if I had been brave and stayed instead of running back to Ryan?

Would we still be together? Would we have a child of our own?

But the biggest what if of all, what if I see her again?

I read a quote once that said 'it's easy to fall in love but hard to find someone who will catch you.' I suppose that's true. I fell for Sophie straight away but I ran away without even giving her the chance to catch me. I'd already been caught years earlier by Ryan. She had the greatest impact on my life and I have no idea what impact I had on hers.

Maybe I haven't got my happy ending but maybe they don't exist. Maybe happy endings only exist in fairy tales. I'm married to a man who adores me and together we have a beautiful son who I love with all my heart, it may not be perfect but does it need to be? Maybe this is my happy ending, maybe this marriage is as good as it gets. If Ryan and I divorced, I know I would be upset.

In Disney movies, happy endings were essential, no matter how many parts of the film were upsetting, the happy ending was guaranteed. The audience demand it. They demand a happy ending because it makes them feel warm and fuzzy inside. Maybe the reason we demand happy endings in films is because we know that in life, they're a rarity.

I'm 29 now and I don't know what my future has in store for me but perhaps I will get my happy ending. I can't help but think of Sophie when I think of my happy ending. Love at first sight is a cliché but I experienced it with her.

I can be happy in the life I live. It may not be the happy ending I dreamed of but I can live with that. I tell myself this most nights when I feel Ryan press his front against my back, his arm pulling me closer.

Orson Welles said that if you want a happy ending, it depends on where you stop your story. Maybe I stopped my story too short so I'm missing the final chapters. Maybe my story ends 'and they lived happily ever after.' However I can't believe that theory. I need this to be where my story ends. I tell myself that this is my happy ending because if I don't, if I tell myself that my happy ending exists with Sophie Webster then I'll go and find her.

And that scares the shit out of me.


	2. Chapter 2

My favourite movie is A Walk to Remember. I love how it breaks away from the traditional structure of a romantic film. Jaime Sullivan told Landon Carter not to fall in love with her but he did it anyway. The main reason why I love this movie though is because it shows just how incapable human beings are to ignore their feelings. We're all helpless when it comes to love. It's such a small word but its ramifications are extraordinarily large. Even if we know that falling in love isn't the best thing, we'll still do it. It's a natural thing for everybody. Most times, falling in love doesn't end happily; there is a high chance that you'll get hurt. I should know. It's happened to me but maybe for a few lucky people, falling in love gives you the happy ending you so desperately crave.

I was 14 when I first suspected I was gay. I knew something made me different than all my friends. Their bedrooms were decorated with posters of hot male celebrities like Johnny Depp whilst mine were filled with old fashioned movie actresses like Judy Garland and Ingrid Bergman. I told myself that it was because I admired them as actresses and nothing more but a part of me always knew that there was more to it than that.

I was 15 when I first kissed a girl. It wasn't the way I had imagined or what I had expected my first kiss to be like but it was magical. I know that sounds cheesy but it's true. My first kiss was with my best friend. We were playing spin the bottle at a friend's party and the first spin of the bottle landed on her. With another spin, it ended up pointing at me. I remember her smiling before crawling over to me. She didn't wait; instead she pressed her lips against mine softly. I remember my lips moved with hers and for those few seconds, I felt something I didn't know I could. I felt alive. Afterwards she told me that if she had to have kissed anybody, she was glad it was me. I never told her she was my first kiss.

I was 17 when I finally stop hiding from myself and admitted my true sexuality. I'd been on a few dates with guys and never felt anything towards them; in fact I couldn't wait for the date to be over. When they had kissed me, I never felt anything, not like when Amy had kissed me. The new girl at school made me admit that the reason I never enjoyed my dates with guys was because I was gay. She made me come out. I fancied her straight away, the way her nose crinkled when she smiled and the way she would occasionally blow her hair out of her eyes. She was straight though and didn't notice me at all so we didn't have the fairy tale romance, but I will always be grateful to her for making me realize who I was.

The first person I told I was gay was my sister Rosie. I thought she would freak out, what with her being completely addicted to men but she was surprisingly supportive. She even took me to my first gay bar and pushed me to be more confident when it came to talking to women. I owe my first girlfriend to her.

I was 21 when I had my heart broken for the first time. Rebecca was my first and last girlfriend. We dated since I was 17 and she was 19. I thought she was the one but I know I was only kidding myself. Maybe I just wanted to feel like our four year relationship wasn't a waste of time. I got my answer when I found out that she was cheating on me. Our relationship meant that little to her that she started sleeping with her ex-girlfriend leaving me single and determined to never get into a relationship again.

After Rebecca I decided to embrace the young, free and single aspect of life. Being in a long-term relationship so young had put me off relationships for a good while. Maybe being with Rebecca made me contemplate marriage and a future but clearly I was the only one thinking about it. She hurt me so my philosophy became why should I let anybody else get close enough to hurt me. I was going to use girls just like Rebecca used me, it may not sound nice or polite but that's the harsh true of it.

I was 23 when I met her. I saw her from across the bar and I felt an urge to approach her. She was clearly drowning her sorrows from the way she swallowed her drink in one go before ordering another. Her blonde hair cascaded around her face but my gaze was drawn to her bright cobalt eyes. They were beautiful.

So was she.

We didn't really speak much, I told her my name and she gave me only her first name. Straight away we knew what the situation was.

We had sex; it was as simple as that.

That was all. We had drunken sex. She was just some girl I picked up in a bar. I could tell that she was upset so I decided to comfort her and things just got out hand. I kissed her and at first I thought she wasn't going to respond but then when her lips moved in synchronization with mine, I felt it.

That feeling I had when I was 15 was back, only intensified.

When we went back to my place, I had to keep telling myself that it was just sex, nothing more, nothing less. I'd done this plenty of times before. Brought some random girl back to my flat and then in the morning they would leave and we would pretend that nothing happened.

Sian was different though. She was different in every way. She looked so lost and upset that all I wanted to do was help her. When she climbed on top of me, I could see the confusion in her eyes, the worry and the nerves which washed over her entire body. I calmed her, told her we could stop now if she wanted but she didn't want to. I've never cared about a random girl before but with her, I felt like she needed somebody to care for her.

I wanted to be that person.

When I found her wedding ring, I couldn't help but look at her confused and a little hurt. Sure I slept around but I slept with single people. Married people were not my forte. I felt as though she had lied to me. She had tricked me when she hadn't. I'd never asked if she was single, I was too focused on her to ask the simple questions. I think it was then that I realised I felt something for her. It was then that I realised I was in trouble. I was upset that she was married and I felt as if she had used me. She kissed me before I could ask her about it and then the strangest thing of all happened.

She thanked me.

I mean, I've been thanked for sex before but that wasn't why she was thanking me. She thanked me for making her feel alive and then she left. I watched motionless as she got dressed before she walked out of my flat and out of my life. I didn't even get her surname.

She said I made her feel more alive than she had ever felt and truthfully she did the exact same thing to me. For the past two years I had been mulling around, sleeping with any girl who looked my way. It's not the best way to live your life and Sian made me realised that I didn't want to live it that way anymore. I do want the relationship, the future with somebody but it took Sian to make me realise that.

I went to the place we met every night for two weeks hoping that she would make another appearance but she never came. I willed her to walk through the door but she never did. She probably went back to her husband. I know she's not gay, I knew straight away. But it didn't stop me, I had to have her. Watching her from across the bar had made my stomach flip and I couldn't stay away from her.

That was five years ago now but I can't shake that memory. She is always on my mind, no matter what I do. I can't help but wonder what happened to her. I wonder if she's happy. The fact that she was different from everybody else made me fall for her straight away.

It may have taken me a while to admit that to myself but it's true.

I fell for her.

I wanted her to stay the night; I wanted her to be there when I woke up. She needed somebody, anyone could see that. She was so lost.

And truth is so was I.

I tried to move on; I even dated a girl for several months, hoping that it wasn't Sian I wanted but the relationship with somebody. I wanted the closeness you felt when you had a girlfriend. Somebody you could talk to, somebody you could share your worries with but it didn't work. I wanted Sian.

One girl should not have this much of an effect on me and I really wish I didn't let her affect me but she does.

Maybe I have to accept that that one night we shared is all I'm going to get. Maybe I should just move on, Sian clearly has.

I was a one night stand.

Nothing more, nothing less.

She's probably living happily with her husband in some fancy house, probably in the country. They'll have children, a boy and a girl and of course the family dog. And me, I'm left wondering what if?

What if I'd asked her surname?

What if I had made her stay?

Would we have the fancy house, children and the family dog?

And the biggest what if of all, what if I ever see her again?

But unfortunately you can't live your life with what ifs. It's over. My dream or hopes or whatever it was, is over. I'm never going to see Sian again and I have to accept that.

Except I can't.

She made me feel things that no other girl has managed to do and I can't just forget that.

Realization is a funny thing. It can hit you when you least expect it and quite often, it hits you hard. I was 23 when I had a crystallising moment. I thought she would just be another girl but now I know that she was so much more. I felt hurt when I saw the wedding ring and I shouldn't have. I sleep with girls as if it a hobby. I use girls but with Sian, I didn't use her. If she hadn't worn a ring, maybe I would have told her to stay the next morning rather than leave. Maybe we would have started a relationship.

I guess I'll never know.

She's the first girl since Rebecca that has made me want a relationship.

I was 23 when we met and now I'm 28.

I've never met anybody who had this much of an influence on me before.

Now I'm going to find her because if I haven't been able to get her out of my mind in five years, she must be pretty special. Although I think I knew that from the first time I saw her. It's what made me approach her. She was beautiful and special.

I haven't thought of myself as a girlfriend kind of person since Rebecca. Now I much prefer to keep things simple, much less drama that way. But I can't help thinking that if I carry on that way; Sian will forever become the one that got away. And if I don't find her, I'm going to regret it.

Maybe she won't feel the same and maybe she'll stay with her husband. Maybe she'll tell me to go away. But I have to take that chance because I've never lost anything before; I'm not going to lose someone who could be the one for me.

Happy endings are a funny concept. I mean, we all want one but how many of us actually get them? My parents thought they had found theirs before they divorced when I was 19. Maybe that's what life is though, not just one big happy ending but a series of smaller ones. During my four year relationship with Rebecca, I was happy. Maybe that's all that matters, that you're happy for a certain period of time. Maybe it's not possible to have a complete happy ending because in order to have that, you need to know where your story ends and right now, I feel like mine is just beginning. I'm only on the first chapter of my story with Sian so who knows. Maybe I will get my happy ending with her. Maybe that is where my story ends.

But in order to know the concluding words to my story, I need to find her and the idea of that scares me to death because what if I'm right.

What if she is the one?


	3. Chapter 3

_I've hit a bit of a writer's block with Second Chance and got some inspiration to conclude this fic after struggling to finish it for months. I don't know if people remember it because it's been a few months since I wrote it but I hope people will still read it and enjoy it. The quote at the end does not belong to me. Comments are much appreciated._

In typical Disney movies, the hero or heroine and their sidekicks get their happily ever after whilst the villain of the story doesn't. But in life, defining which character you are is debatable. I got my happy ending, so surely that classifies me as the heroine? But in order to gain my happy ending, I had to ruin somebody else's so what if I'm not the heroine, what if I'm the villain?

**Sophie:**

I wish I could say that I searched for her, maybe even hired a private detective but I didn't. Don't get me wrong, if I didn't find her, I would have probably hired somebody to look for her. No as luck would have it I found her completely by accident.

Maybe it was fate that brought us back together again.

Although I never really believe in fate or a concept of destiny before I met her. I didn't believe that everybody is supposed to follow a certain path in life, that we have only one path to take. I thought everything was up to the individual. You decide how to live your own life. You may make the wrong choices but at the end of the day, you can take satisfaction in knowing that you have decided your own fate.

I let Sian walk out of my flat and out of my life. I could have stopped her, I should have. But I didn't and that's my cross to bear. I have to live with the fact that I watched her walk out of my life. But you know what they say, if it's meant to be, it'll happen.

And then I found her. So maybe fate really does exist.

It had been five years since I last saw her and then after deciding to find her, I saw her. I went to a job interview as a waitress and there she was. Just like that. Not a mirage, not an illusion, not a mind trick, she was actually standing twenty feet away from me. She dropped a stack of plates when she first saw me. I had a fear that she wouldn't actually remember but the fact that she did, well that gave me comfort.

My doubts about whether I would ever find her made me nearly not want to bother. I mean how far can you look for somebody when the only information you know about them is the fact that their first name is Sian.

The probability of finding her was incredibly slim. Yet I did.

Yeah, I've changed my mind. Fate exists.

Our first conversation had been brief. I think she was surprised to see me. I can still remember the look of shock which fell across her face. Her mouth opened and closed quickly after as she couldn't form any words. She still looked beautiful, if anything she had simply become more beautiful with age.

"_Hi." As soon as her eyes landed on mine, I said the first word I could think of. I wish it had been something more romantic but so be it. Once I had laid eyes on her, I had to approach her. It was like our first meeting all over again._

_Sian simply stared at me, unable to form any words. She looked like a deer trapped in headlights. It was cute. She still looked as beautiful as the first time we met. Last time we met, she'd been wearing a fancy dress and now she was dressed in checked pants, a white jacket and an apron which had been splattered by the sauce of food but she still looked sexy as hell._

"_Long time no see." I rolled my eyes at the mundane comments I was making. _

"_Sophie Webster." My heart fluttered as she uttered my name for the first time in five years. Last time I had heard her speak my name was when I kissed her softly, my fingers working their magic. "I never thought I'd see you again."_

_A soft smile filled my face. "Likewise."_

"_What are you doing here?"_

"_We spend the night together five years ago, you don't call, you don't write."I tried to joke with her but the look which crossed her face told me she wasn't in the mood for joking. "Sorry, I have a tendency to make jokes when I'm in an awkward situation...evidently not funny jokes."_

_A ghost of a smile crept onto her face before she realized and dropped it. "Why are you here?"_

"_I came about the job, I had no idea you were the chef here." _

_She started to pace her kitchen; her breathing was irregular and quick. "You can't be here."I was about to ask why but she was already answering my question. "My husband is going to be here any second." I tried to ignore the flash of hurt which crossed my face at the mention of a husband. "You need to go."_

"_I haven't seen you in five years and coincidentally I'm after a job in the very same restaurant you work as the head chef and you're asking me to go." I was still getting over the shock of seeing her just after deciding to look for her. "Tell me you don't think us meeting again is a coincident."_

_Sian bit down on her bottom lip but didn't answer me. "Sian?" I closed my eyes at the sound of a male voice and I knew when the person walked into the kitchen, Sian would greet him as her husband._

"_Be out in a minute." She shouted before looking at me with pleading eyes and I nodded before walking past her towards the fire exit. _

"_Sophie." I turned around the sound of her voice. "Meet me at 8 and we can talk."_

_She wanted to talk to me; I couldn't stop the happiness which overtook my entire body. Maybe I still had a chance with her. "Meet you where?"_

_She smiled shyly at me before tucking a strand of hair behind her right ear. "The place we first met." She turned around and left the kitchen, leaving me with a smile on my face which made me look like the cat who got the cream._

_I've sat in this bar more times then I'd rather remember. Every time but one, I sat here and prayed that Sian would walk through the doors, walk back into my life. This time is no exception. I'm praying that she hasn't got cold feet and backed out of coming, I am crossing each finger and every toe in the hope that she will make an appearance._

_Ten hours ago I woke up with every intention of finding Sian and only five hours ago I actually found her, albeit by complete accident. Every part of my body was on tenterhooks, nerves consuming me. I turned at the sound of somebody clearing their throat. Sian was standing beside me. _

_She came...she actually came._

"_You're here." It was only after seeing her that I realised I'd been holding my breath._

"_Yeah, I'm surprised too." Sian said quietly as she took the seat next to me, ordering an orange juice straightaway. "Why have you come back into my life?"_

_I swallowed hard before running my hands over my thighs, the way she was looking at me made me feel under pressure. She was expecting answers that I wasn't even sure I had. "Maybe I was meant to."_

"_Don't do that...don't dodge the question."_

_I sighed heavily before shrugging my shoulders. "I don't know. All I know is that you have been on my mind for five fucking years and then when I decide to look for you, I find you. All I know is that night we spent together was the best night of my life. All I know is that I fell for you that night." _

"_It seems you know a lot." Sian ducked her head and I felt relieved to be free from her intense gaze. "You've been on my mind too."I smiled at her before taking a risk and grabbing her hand only for her to shrink away from my touch. "But you can't be. I'm married, I have a son."_

"_Are you happy?" She didn't reply. "Did I mean anything to you? Did the night we spent together mean anything?" When she still didn't reply, I could feel my temper flaring. "Answer me Sian."_

"_Yes." _

"_To which question?" _

"_Yes, you mean something to me. Yes, so did the night we spent together." Sian clarified before looking me directly in the eyes. God she really does have beautiful eyes. "No I'm not happy."_

_I tried to hide my glee when I heard her answer. "Thank you." She nodded but stayed silent. "You said you have a son, how old is he?"_

_Sian smiled before reaching into her bag and pulling out her purse. "He's three." Sian grabbed a picture from her purse and handed it to me. "His name is Patrick."_

_I traced the picture gently. Staring back at me was an adorable little boy with a mop of brown hair and her eyes. He had Sian's eyes. "He looks just like you."_

_Sian blinked before raising her head to look at me. "Really?" I nodded in response, giving her the picture back. "Everybody always says he looks like Ryan."_

"_Ryan...he's your husband."_

"_Yeah, although he's probably more of a glorified best friend." I furrowed my eyebrows and waited for her to continue. "I'm not in love with him, I haven't been since..."_

"_Since us."_

"_Yeah, since us." Sian agreed. "I never forgot about you." _

"_Then why didn't you look for me?"_

"_Why didn't you look for me?" Sian countered._

"_I tried." I began. "I came here every night for two weeks in the hope that maybe you'd be here again. Maybe we could have more than a one night stand but you never showed up. I never even knew your last name; do you know how many Sian's there are in this city? You on the other hand, you knew my surname and where I lived so tell me, why didn't you look for me?"_

"_Because I couldn't." _

"_Why not?"_

"_Because I'm with Ryan. Was I just supposed to destroy my marriage over a one night stand? I promised him, 'till death do us part', I wasn't going to break my vows." Sian explained. "They're important to me."_

"_I was more than just a one night stand." I said. "You've just said that you never forgot me, that I've been on your mind. I wouldn't be if you wanted to be with him. You said yourself you're not happy." I grabbed her hand again and this time she didn't pull away. "Maybe the reason you're not happy is because you're not supposed to be with him Sian."_

"_He's Patrick's dad." _

"_He'll always be Patrick's dad, that doesn't mean he'll always have to be your husband." I brought my right hand up to cup her cheek and she nuzzled into my touch. "You can be happy Sian."She closed her eyes and I took that as my chance. Closing the space between us, I pressed my lips against hers gently, only for a fraction of a second before I pulled away. _

_She opened her eyes slowly. "I'm scared."_

"_What of?"_

"_Being with you." She said. "We spent one night together five years ago, I should have been able to forget you but I can't. I have thought about you all the time, I've thought about what would have happened if I'd stayed, whether we would still be together. I've thought about whether I meant anything to you." She took a breath before speaking again. "That night made me fall for you and it shouldn't have. You were a stranger Sophie Webster; you shouldn't have had such a grand impact on my life. So I'm scared of being with you because you made me wonder whether or not to leave my husband. You made me doubt my marriage and most importantly myself. You made me believe that my happy ending wasn't with Ryan but with you. I'm scared in case I'm wrong." _

_A silent tear slid down her cheek before I wiped it away with the pad of my thumb. I didn't want her to cry because of me. "When I was 21, I had my heart broken. My girlfriend cheated on me and after that I decided that the whole relationship thing, well it just wasn't me. So I slept around and then I met you." I explained. "You made me doubt the life I had been living. I knew you were different straight away but I had no idea how much of an effect you would have on my life. I fell for you too. And I promised myself that I wouldn't let that happen. I wouldn't fall for somebody ever again and then you showed up and made that theory fly out the window. You wondered if you meant anything to me. You meant everything. So you're scared, so am I." I said, placing my hand on her thigh. "It's okay to be afraid."_

"_This morning I woke up to what I thought would be my life forever and then just like that, you walk back into it." Sian wiped away the tears which were falling down her cheeks. "Maybe you're right. Maybe you were supposed to come back into my life. Maybe it's fate."_

_I smiled at her, she made me feel things I'd never felt before in one night and now here she was making me feel nervous, excited and happy just by having a conversation. I was right about Sian, she was special. "I'm ready to take the risk if you are."I stood up and held out my hand, hoping she was ready to. Hoping that five years was enough time._

_She grabbed my hand in hers and entwined our fingers. "Sophie Webster, what are you doing to me?"_

_I kissed her softly once more. I've decided that I will never grow tired of kissing her. "I'm giving you your happy ending."_

**Sian:**

When I decided to take the risk of being with Sophie, I knew that I would have to end things with Ryan. I would have to tell the man who had been a major part of my life for thirteen years, the man who had comforted me when I suffered a miscarriage and the man who was the father of my child that I didn't want to be with him anymore. Turns out, saying you'll do something is a hell of a lot easier than actually doing it.

It took me several days before I had the confidence to tell him, after a reassuring 'pep talk' from Sophie. When I walked away from Sophie in her flat, I hoped to God that my marriage with Ryan would improve but it never did. I pretended that everything was normal, I ignored the fact that his kisses didn't give me butterflies, I wasn't sure they ever did. I lived in my own little bubble pretending that I had gotten my happy ending with him but I guess I was right, my happy ending lies with Sophie.

Telling Ryan was the hardest thing to do. The worst thing was though; he didn't have a clue how unhappy I was. He didn't know that I fell out of love with him a long time ago. Why should he have? I never told him.

I do love Ryan, I always have; I'm just wasn't in love with him. Not anymore. I read once that if you fall in love with two people at the same time, you should pick the second person. The reason being, if you truly loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second. I guess that's right.

I should never have picked Ryan over Sophie because I fell for her hook, line and sinker.

I should never have walked out of Sophie's flat because that turned out to be the biggest mistake of my life.

Incidentally I should never have cheated in the first place but had I not; I would never have met Sophie. So I don't regret that, truth is I'd do it again.

The hurt which crossed her face when she first felt my wedding ring made me believe that I meant something to her. When she told me that she had been thinking about me for the last five years, I believed her because of that hurt.

She loved me. Sophie Webster was in love with me.

Hearing her say that made my heart swell. Thinking about her for the past five years hadn't been in vain. It had all been worthwhile because now I have the woman who has plagued my thoughts. Now she is one of the most important people in my life, along with my son.

I was 29 when we met again and only a year later did Sophie propose. Unlike Ryan, she didn't propose to me in front of all our family and friends, no, she proposed to me in Times Square in New York. She fulfilled my ideal proposal. Why? Because unlike Ryan, I actually told her my dream proposal, I shared every morsel of information with her because it was the right thing to do. I now understand why I never told Ryan, it was because my dream proposal was supposed to be done with the person I am destined to be with. And that's Sophie.

I was 31 when we married. Some may say we rushed into it, after all, it is such a big commitment but both Sophie and I knew that it was the right thing to do. We had missed out on five years of being together; we were determined not to waste any more time. It wasn't a fancy wedding, I'd already done the whole white wedding with Ryan and looked how that turned out. No, we kept it simple. Only close family and friends were invited. It was simple yet perfect.

I was 32 when Sophie gave birth to our second child, she loved Patrick as if he was her own and when Isabella joined our family, it felt like we finally had the happy family. The cliché 2.4 children. Patrick adored his little sister straight away; he is going to be so protective of her when she's older. Patrick and Isabella are going to make sure that Sophie and I are always on our toes. But I wouldn't have it any other way.

It took some time but eventually Ryan forgave me. It was more the fact I had cheated which hurt him more than the fact I had fallen out of love with him. I can understand that. He is still an amazing dad to Patrick and he is actually Isabella's godfather. I may not be in love with him but I never wanted to cut him out of my life. He will always mean the world to me. He was my first for so many things and although Sophie will be my last, Ryan will always have a special part of my heart. Sophie understands that and thank God she isn't jealous. Not that there would be any reason for her to be jealous. I just need to look at her and my heart swells with love.

I still cannot believe she is my wife.

I'm 33 now and the knowledge that ten years ago I was married to Ryan and hadn't even met Sophie is still a fascinating concept. If somebody had told me then where I would end up, I would never have believed them. I'd have probably laughed in their face. It really is amazing how one person has the ability to turn your world completely upside down.

Sometimes when I'm alone, when Patrick is with Ryan and Sophie is looking after Isabella, I think to myself what if.

What if Sophie hadn't come in for a job?

What if I hadn't been brave enough to take a risk?

What if Sophie didn't love me enough to wait?

And the biggest what if of all, what if she leaves me?

I'd never been a fan of karma; the whole concept of what goes around comes around sounded like a myth to me but what if it exists. I broke Ryan's heart; does that mean Sophie will break mine? Sophie told me that when she was 21, she had her heart broken and she never planned to let that happen again. Could I break hers like I broke Ryan's? Was I capable of that?

I wanted to say no but I'd already broken one heart.

That worry aside, Sophie is the love of my life; she is for all intents and purposes, my soul mate. I love her more than I ever loved Ryan. I always wondered whether I'd get a happy ending. I knew that my happy ending resided with Sophie and now I have her. I can honestly say that I have never been happier than I am right now but who knows what the future holds. I had no idea Sophie would walk back into my life so I'm not even going to attempt to guess what will happen next. I have my happy ending now and if my story ended here, the concluding words would be 'and they lived happily ever after.'

But then again, life's not a fairytale, it's not a Disney movie so do you ever really get a happy ending?

I mean, is there even such a thing?

_**"True love doesn't have a happy ending because true love doesn't end."**_


End file.
